STUDENTS’ RIGHTS: MYTH OR REALITY?

DELIVERED IN REPRESENTATION OF THE FACULTY OF LAW AT THE 1ST SCOLA INTER-FACULTY ORATORY CONTEST ON APRIL 1,2016.

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To be or not to be. That was the question that bothered the mind of Young Hamlet in the day of Shakespeare. It is a question which has lingered in our hearts for centuries without an answer. But it is not our problem today. Today the question is – has it been or has it not. Students’ rights: a myth or a reality?

Ladies and gentlemen, speaking is Adebajo Adekunle Adefisayo, a representative of the faculty of law here to dance with my lips to the melodious question – student rights: a myth or a reality. Do students really have freedoms? And if they do, do they have them merely by a stretch of imagination or in the actual recognition of our dear nation?

You may ask – what do we speak of here. What even are students’ right? Well, students’ right is our right to attend classes and not have to leave home extra-early because the hall is not big enough. Students’ right is our right to peacefully express our grievance and not get served a hot meal of SDC letters. Students’ right is our right to an environment that is conducive for learning, where there is ventilation, whether from ACs or fans. And I do not mean hand fans. Ladies and gentlemen, it is our right to pay tuition and not have to struggle to pay attention while getting doses of education.

Kay Granger once said, ‘human rights are not a privilege granted by the few, they are a liberty entitled to all.’ And so, students have rights just like everyone else. But the point is; are we getting them like everyone else? For it is one thing to have a first class pedigree and it’s another to have a first class degree. It’s one thing to be eligible for bed space according to the porter and another to be eligible according to UI portal.

Fellow students, today’s topic calls to mind some agonising ironies in our world.

Do we have rights in reality? Yes we do. In the reality of section 295 of the Criminal Code which provides in clear terms that everyone above the age of sixteen may not be corrected by a blow or other force; and that excessive force shall not be used in any case. However, in the reality of NASU members, students are never too old to get a taste of the cane. In the reality of Professor O.M. Ndimele of the University of Port Harcourt, there is no wrong in tattooing the skin of students with parallel lines.

Do we have rights in reality? Yes, ladies and gentlemen. Yes we do. In the reality of section 36 of the constitution which guarantees for every person the right to fair hearing. But then in the reality of Almighty Student Disciplinary Committee, a student case is nothing but a case of two foxes and a sheep voting on what to have for breakfast. In the reality of our lecturers, you are not innocent until proven guilty. Rather you are guilty with no chance to prove your innocence.

Do we have rights in reality? Yes, we do. We do in the reality of the case of Garba & Ors v University of Maiduguri where the Supreme Court held that the expelled students were not granted justice by the university. But what we find in the reality of the school? We find numerous miscarriages of justice and somersaults of fairness as we found again two days ago in the case of MOTE & Ors v. the SDC. One wonders if the Disciplinary Committee itself has discipline. One wonders if it is even a committee or a martial court.

Friends, the rights of students sometimes is like a dancing mirage which dances energetically in the pages of our laws and on the tongue of our leaders; but which never gives an harvest of laughter. When it comes to our rights, our politicians and professors have a high blood pressure of vocal expression but an anaemia of profitable actions. Our rights are the cars which ferry Student Union leaders to their coveted offices during elections. But after elections? After elections, we will hear that there is hike in fuel price and so this car can no longer move. We hear that the bank of justice has been robbed and is bankrupt. We hear that the buttery of impartiality and welfarism has caught fire. Ladies and gentlemen, we hear all kinds of things.

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When I saw the topic, what came to my mind was – how can we reduce something as fundamental as fundamental human rights to the fabulous tales of Ijapa tiroko oko yanibo? How can we reduce it to the fantastic legends of the seeker? Why should we have to doubt and debate whether or not we have rights? Why do we even need SCOLA to advocate vehemently for our rights? Why? Well, I’ll tell you why. We need them not because our rights are a myth or a reality. We need them because our rights are a myth in reality.

Malcolm X once said; nobody can give you freedom. Nobody can give you equality or justice or anything. If you’re a man, you take it. And so, ladies and gentlemen, greatest Nigerian students, if you want to see your rights in 3D and not just on paper. If you want freedom, you must take it. If you want victory, you must struggle – why because as we all know; aluta continua victoria ascerta.

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DOES AFRICA ALONE HAVE THE CAPACITY TO FIGHT TERRORISM?

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Photo Credit: Defence Web

PRESENTED AT JAW WAR 2015 QUARTER-FINAL ON THE 7TH OF OCTOBER, 2015.

GEORGE C. Kimble said; the darkest thing about Africa is not its black people, its black magic or even its shocking history of slavery and colonialism. The darkest thing about Africa has always been our ignorance of Africa. Many persons cannot fathom what Africa truly is, the great qualities she possesses and the magnificent things she is capable of. And so when it is asked that: can Africa fight terrorism, as a matter of reflex and inferiority complex; we tend to forget the facts and even flex the index – all in a bid to say no.

JUDGES, fellow warriors in this tournament, ladies and gentlemen: Good evening to you all. Here stands an African, Adebajo Adekunle Adefisayo, from the faculty of law proudly saying yes to the question – DOES AFRICA ALONE HAVE THE CAPACITY TO FIGHT TERRORISM?

FOR the sake of clarity, the United Nations General Assembly in 1994 described terrorism as criminal acts intended or calculated to provoke a state of terror in the general public, a group of persons or particular persons for political purposes…

OUR Yoruba elders often tell us that a society without laws is a society without sins and flaws – ilu ti o ba ti sofin, ko le si ese. You see, though social scientists may not wear suits on a normal day, they do so by all means today because it is then law, the way of public speaking. Premised on this, I can confidently say that Africa’s legal weaponry is a perfect start in the fight against terrorism. This is evidenced by Article 23, Section 2, Paragraph (b) of the African Charter on Human and People’s Rights which categorically provides that for the purpose of strengthening peace, solidarity and friendly relations, state parties to the present Charter shall ensure that their territories shall not be used as bases for subversive or terrorist activities.

MOVING ON, the existence and re-emergence of the Central Multi-National Force against Boko-Haram between Nigeria, Chad, Niger, Cameroon and Benin shows that Africa has the unity and solidarity necessary to fight the monsters in our territory.

MOREOVER, what could be more convincing of our capacity to fight terrorists if not the 2014 Global Terrorism Index which places as many as 10 African countries in the list of top 32 countries with least cases of terrorism.

ALSO, it is as clear as the Zik River that the social values in Africa are a nightmare for terrorism. It is these values of justice and equity that propelled the formation of the Civilian Joint Task Force which has been doing a wonderful job in North-Eastern Nigeria fighting and ousting the menace of Boko Haram.

FURTHERMORE, the great Marcus Cicero once remarked – to know nothing of what happened before you were born is to forever remain a child. Thus, the question begging to be asked is: has Africa ever fought or won any fight against terrorists? Besides, how better to judge Africa’s capacity other than through the caps in Africa’s reality? Africa has indeed won several battles against terrorism. And a good instance is the 1985 total obliteration of the Yan Tatsine. We also have the Lord’s Resistance Militancy of Uganda, the Revolutionary United Front of Sierra Leone and the Die Boermag of South Africa ALL of which are heard of no more today. And ah, not to forget our dear Niger Delta Militants who by the way promised us a Civil War should Uncle Jonathan lose the election. Six months later, it is apparent they only had the jaw but not the means to start the war.

IF my friends from the Social Sciences claim that Africa lacks military might to fight the blight of terrorism, please tell them that according to the 2015 Global FirePower list which ranks countries by military strength, India has the fourth best military in the world. However, this does not stop the same India from being ranked number six of the most terrorised nations of the world by the Global Terrorism Index.

FINALLY ladies and gentlemen, before I leave the stage, I must warn us. I fear that my opponents will soon come here to dish out a perfectly prepared delicacy full of the red herring fallacy. I fear that they will present an irrelevant item in order to divert attention from the original problem. And so, let us remember that the topic of today’s debate is not do individual African countries have the capacity. It is – does Africa, the continental land of milk and honey, have the capacity to fight terrorism. Therefore, my answer remains yes, yes and yes! If we combine the acuity of South Africans, the practicality of Egyptians, the numerical capacity of Nigerians, the martial vitality of Kenyans and the positive peculiarities of the 50 other Africa nations, we will not only fight the terrible terrorists terrifying our terra firma, we will in fact win that fight.

NIGERIA’S EDUCATION: A THEORISED KNOWLEDGE?

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Photo Credit: Getty Images

A speech delivered on November 4, 2015 and which got me the “King of the Podium” appellation (2015/2016) as far as Kenneth Mellanby Hall is concerned.

It is said that when the head is too big, it cannot dodge blows… The head of today’s event, Nigeria’s education, is bigger than its body and thus must endure being constantly discussed.

Good day fellow Mellanbites, kingmakers, fellow speakers and the audience. Before you is Adebajo Adekunle Adefisayo, an aspirant for the crown of the podium. And I am here to take the floor on the question – Nigeria’s education: a theorised knowledge?

Ladies and gentlemen, Terence once said nothing is said which has not been said before. It has, before now, been argued that our education system is not laden with theorised knowledge because we have various practical sessions like industrial training, teaching practice and chamber attachments. It has also been argued that the presence of quality private schools has greatly reduced focus on theory. It may even be argued that our knowledge is not theorised because we not only have theory questions in our examination, we also have German and objective ones. But we all know that these arguments may not hold air let alone water.

Finding an irrefutable assertion is like finding a popular YouTube video with no dislike. There are always two sides to a coin and two ends to a rope. And so it behoves me to examine the other side to this argument which in fact appears to be heavier. To compare it with the former is to compare Mellanby hall to a boys quarters.

The reality today is that our education system is crude and lacks exposure. It not only focuses on theory but off-base, out-of-date triviality. Our lecturers for instance find nothing wrong in using pre-colonial lesson notes 55 years after independence. We have engineers who do not move near engines, doctors who know no better than conductors and Professors of Mechanical Engineering who still take their engines to the mechanics for engineering. Our students can define the internet but cannot use it, they can define a laboratory and in fact list 10 apparatuses it contains but have never entered one, they can describe a wind turbine but have never seen one; they can talk all day about how the tractor works but we have not for once driven one.

In 2012, investigations carried out by Vanguard Nigeria revealed that many schools in Nigeria lack up to date computer technology and the few that have lack access to electricity. For instance, out of a class of about 60, only one claimed to have once worked on a computer – his uncle’s laptop.

Just last month, the cerebral Dr Olisa Godson Muojama of the History department was on air at Splash FM and he declared that Nigeria is operating mercantile, commercial capitalism and not true industrial capitalism. Meaning we import virtually everything but we do not ourselves create or construct anything. Even the things we manage to create, we still import the raw materials from overseas. Does this then mean Nigerians are too dull or lazy? No, of course not! It is only because our education system does not encourage creative thinking. It only reinforces routine robotic reasoning. The problem is not intelligence but lack of experience. And this cannot help us. It will only cast us in a state of motion without movement, activity without productivity.

You see, when Nigerians go abroad to learn, their genius often becomes manifest because of the change in environment. Almost a 100% of Nigerians who ever invented anything worthy of international recognition benefitted substantially from foreign education – from Saheed Adepoju who invented the Inye tablet to Seyi Oyesola who invented the ‘hospital in a box’, from Jelani Aliyu who made General Motors leading auto-brand to Cyprian Emeka who holds more than 160 patents worldwide. Last May, we also heard about Mr Ufot Ekong who made a speedy electric car while studying in Japan. He definitely would not have achieved that had he studied in University of Ibadan.

Fellow Mellanbites, what I am trying to say in essence is that we have the perfect intellectual pool, but our schools lack the perfect intellectual tools. School is not just about pen and paper; it is about ken and actual encounters. School is not only about learning and character; it is about knowing and being a master. School is not about la cram la pour la pass la forget; it is about la grasp la tour la surpass la recollect.

Gentlemen, I shall close by quoting from Benjamin Franklin, a foremost American statesman.  He said tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn. And so if our education sector is truly interested in the impartation of knowledge, then it must provide not just updated theory but engaging practicality and actual intellectual activity.

Post scriptum: Paragraphs 3, 4, 8 and the last sentence weren’t part of the final delivery due to temporal inadequacy.

DEMOCRACY IS THE BEST SYSTEM OF GOVERNMENT

ower to the people

BEING A DEBATE TOPIC PRESENTED ON THE 27TH OF JUNE, 2014; AT AN LnD MEETING, FACULTY OF LAW, U.I.


As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master; that expresses my idea of democracy

~ Abraham Lincoln.

…..………… [GREETINGS] ………………

Today, we have countless systems of government in the world which we can choose from, while some are just on paper, others operate in the corners of true power. We have hyper-anarchy [government by no one], barbarocracy [government by barbarians], foolocracy [government by fools], chrysoaristocracy [government by the wealthy], diabolocracy [government by the devil], kleptocracy [government by thieves]; and as put by our own political analyst and verbal contortionist, Patrick Obahiagbon, we also have kakistomoboplutocracy [government by the worst of mobs who are rich]. But then, ladies and gentlemen, I stand here today to tell us that the best of all these governmental systems, which has been tested and trusted for centuries, is nothing but Democracy [rule by the people]. Just as Ronald Reagan said; ‘it is the most deeply honourable form of government ever devised by man.’

Before I proceed to stating the premises on which I base this assertion, I would like to define the term democracy. We may say it is a form of government in which all eligible citizens participate equally – either directly or indirectly through elected representatives. It is, according to Aristotle, when the indigent and not the men of property are the rulers. When we say ‘power to the people’; when we say ‘putting people over politics’; that is democracy. And by saying, democracy is the best system of government; it does not mean it is perfect, just that it is better than all others. There is no better substitute for it.

Democracy is the best form of government because:

  1. It respects and promotes human rights, and even gender and animal rights. The self-evident and God-given rights of man are easily secured in a democratic system. These rights are even entrenched in a written code, just as we have in Chapter IV of the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria.
  2. All are equal before the law. This is because democracy incorporates elements of nomocracy [the rule of law] and pantisocracy [the rule of everyone equally]. It is undoubtedly only in a true democratic system that we can find a fisherman suing a multi-national oil company, or a lowly citizen suing his president.
  3. Equal representation of both majority and minority interests. Unlike in some political dispensations where only a certain gender or household can be in found in government, where people like me and you may be crucified for dreaming to become head of state; democracy gives all and sundry including the minority a voice. If not for democracy, someone like President Goodluck Jonathan couldn’t have become a Deputy Governor, let alone considering running for a second term as President. Democracy is a system of equality, not a system of only-he-is-quality, it is a system of justice, not that of just-us.
  4. In a democracy, people get what they deserve, they get what they desire. If there is corruption and insecurity, it is because the people are working towards them. It is as a result of their overall decision, and not because some persons forced it down their throat. Thus, the people not only get to decide who is authority, they also get to decide what is their destiny.
  5. Finally, democracy paves way for man to have fundamental freedoms. The freedom of movement, the freedom to vote, the freedom to school, the freedom to use Facebook, twitter and so on. And above all, it also guarantees the freedom of speech because if not for democracy, we will not be here today, debating about democracy.

 

Ladies and gentlemen, it is no coincidence that Norway tops the Global Democracy ranking in 2013 and again tops the UN Human Development Index of the same year. In fact, the top 10 countries in the former ranking except one are among the first 21 in the second.

Tomas Garrigue once said: ‘Democracy has its faults because people have their faults; like owner like store’ – in Czech, ‘jaky pan, takovy kram’. So whatever fault we find to malign democracy is not because of the system, but those running it. Thus, the efficacy of democracy may be got only from the sincerity of humanity.

To conclude, I hope, just as Abraham Lincoln hoped on November 19, 1863; that the ‘government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.’

Thank you!

FIRST SESSION IN OFFICE

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FIRST SESSION IN OFFICE

Ante-Ante-Scriptum: I believe the topic for this article ought to have read ‘first year in office’. However, no thanks to the Academic Staff Union of Universities, that caption has been automatically rendered inappropriate.

Ante-Scriptum: Created this document on my PC since June 28, 2013; opened it on several occasions hoping to add something to it. However it remained unchanged and substantially incomplete for many months. All thanks to God that today, May 10, 2014, almost a year later, I finally am able to be done with it.

It’s been up to a session now since I was saddled with the great responsibility; and perhaps opportunity too, of serving in the position of a class representative once again. Well once again, because I have had a taste of such honour in the past, only that now it is not as a leader of some kindergartners or captain of a class of high school lads; it is as the head of an assemblage of whiz kids, prodigies, soon-to-be jurists and exceptional scholars in Nigeria’s premier university; the University of Ibadan.

The first surprise came when I heard someone shout Kunle; after Mrs Olomola, our first Law 101 lecturer, declared the ground open for nominations into the positions of male and female class representatives. ‘It can’t be’, ‘it has got to be someone else’, ‘who could possibly know me by name’, my thoughts rolled in. But my hope turned vain when nobody else stood up, and the lecturer called for a second time; ‘who is Kunle?’

The second one came when after the voice vote; as if fate was bent on disappointing me, I emerged as the class representative, despite my shortcomings, both overt and covert; and despite the presence of many, better than I am in many aspects, in the same class.

I was even more surprised because I never aspired to or intended to be in such position, even though my action on the morning of that very day, which unexpectedly turned out to be the Election Day, may have triggered the outcome.

I had always wanted to be one who is not easily noticed. One who would come to class quietly, receive lectures, sign attendance registers and leave without anyone’s interference. One who would sit at the tail-end criticising whoever the class rep. was and dishing out my opinions, for the progress of the class, whenever expedient. However, with that singular turn of events, all those hopes were dashed, quashed and short-lived like the Hobbesian state of nature.

I was (and still am) not the most brilliant in the class. I was not the most experienced. I was not the most charismatic. And I certainly was not the most outspoken. How then, I wondered, could I be chosen as the one to lead a class of intellectuals, studying the noblest of professions in Nigeria’s ‘first and best’ university of learning?

The ‘modus operandi’ of what is called ‘destiny’ amazes me at times. What you think could least happen, will happen daringly and remorselessly, and vice versa. I remember that, weeks back, during our medical test [one of freshers’ many rituals] at the law clinic, I was in the gathering of some of my course-mates. One thing led to the other, and a particular lady, I’m not certain of her identity now, said in my presence that I’m ‘not the class rep. type’; and I totally agreed with her. I still think I’m ‘not the type’ though, but then, as the ‘Grand architect of human fate’ would have it, here I am.

Days turn into weeks, and weeks into month. It’s been up to a year now, and I still answer to the title: Class rep. of [now] 200 level law students class [a.k.a. LLB octal-final]. The journey from day one till this moment has been filled with the good, the bad and, of course, the ugly. I have had to do things I ordinarily would not. I have had to meet people I ordinarily wouldn’t move close. Again, I have had to forbear many things, that if I were an ordinary member of the class, I would not have.

WHAT WE HAVE DONE: My appointment into the position is not, so to speak, a political one. I did not engage in campaigning, pleading or manifesto declaration. I was not bound to ‘achieve’ anything through the office, except representing the class, connecting with lecturers and ensuring a smooth ride through our five years in the university. But then, I think it necessary to mention the few things I [and/or we] did in the past year that deviated a little from the routine practice of an average class representative. They are not exceptional, but as this is a recount of my experience in the first session, I will share them still.

  • ‘The Class Directory’: This is where it all started from, I guess. The class directory is a document I prepared before resumption, containing an almost-complete list of names of members of the class along-side spaces to fill-in other details, using the admission lists released by the university. I compiled and designed it solely based on the doctrine of necessity and a spirit of generosity, with no ulterior motives in mind. But then as it turned out, the directory which I publicised on the day of the election, was, more or less, what first endeared me to my colleagues. Anyway, the document has proved useful on many occasions, to both members of the class and non-members alike, in getting the needed contacts.
  • ‘Class versus Congress’: one of the most unforgettable events experienced in the class’s fresher days is the ‘clash with the congress’; the protest of some members of the class at the second (or first?) congress sitting. In short, we were denied our franchise, contrasting what is expressly provided by the LSS (Law Students’ Society) constitution. And rather than argue based on facts and law, the members of the class present that very day decided it best to ‘make them know’ we aren’t docile idiots. They allegedly stood on the chairs, and then some staged a walk-out. The congress was offended, and I eventually had to tender a formal apology before it weeks later. This satisfied them and, in a way, cooled their ego. End of story (or is it … well … not really).
  • ‘Gentleman of the week’: this is another of the projects I embarked on for the class. Every week, I would choose a particular member of the class (male-female-male-female, in that order, week after week). The chosen one would fill, in a form, information such as nick, favourite food, best friend, role model, hobbies, best day on campus, message to colleagues etc. And this would then be uploaded on the Facebook group, as well as the Whatsapp group for others to see. The aim of this apparently is just to bring members of the class into one accord, by facilitating familiarity.
  • ‘Public Address Item’: Aha, well, this came up close to the close of the session. I thought since most of the time, my colleagues complain of not being able to grasp my vocal announcements properly. After I have spoken, many would still ask for what it was I said. Hoping to find a lasting solution to this hitch, I decided to get a mini-public address system; a device that resembles a radio and has a mouthpiece to speak into. I didn’t think to use it several weeks after we resumed from the strike, but when I did use, it really felt awkward, plus it turned out not to be of much use too.
  • ‘Unbeaten Soccer Champs’: one thing that makes me really proud of being a coordinator of the class is that, it is no ordinary class, it is one jam-packed with intelligent, yet equally talented, folks. My course mates are not only bookish, and stylish, they are ‘sportish’.Consecutively, our soccer team has won up to two soccer tournaments and one soccer match, unbeaten on the field of play. First, it was our seniors that challenged us to a match, hoping to welcome us by showing us who’s boss at the faculty. But then, their plot backfired as we turned out to be no rookie at the game. After that, proving our first victory was not a matter of luck, we went ahead to also win the CBN cup and Dean’s cup.

CHALLENGES I CONFRONTED:

  • ‘The Class’: the class has, in a way, been a challenge for me in my capacity as the representative. But then, this is perfectly understandable since we are speaking of learned (or if you may, learning) scholars here; who are perfectly aware of their rights, even the most insignificant, who best know the law and again, how best to break it.

When I say the class has been a challenge, it is primarily in the aspect of cooperation and attentiveness.It is usually frustrating, standing before an audience with an important notice, and then majority of them are making one distracting noise or the other.

Another instance to buttress this challenge is in the area of attendance registers. On one or two occasions, with respect to LAW class I have had to plead with the lecturer not to input the registers. Why, because I would not be able to get back all the lists I passed, God knows why. Maybe, aliens are pilfering them in order to create a database of humans. Just maybe ;-).

  • ‘Finance’: thanks to the Almighty, this hasn’t been much of a challenge. Even though I’m from a humble background, I’ve, thus far, found it bearable to expend money on things such as transport, stationeries and recharge cards (for making calls and browsing); most especially recharge cards.
  • ‘Time management’: sincerely, if I were not in this position, I might have been one of the perpetual late-comers of the class. If I were not the class rep., I would not have had to attend to countless extemporaneous calls from the Faculty Officer, lecturers and students. I would not have had to sacrifice my time for many things that my position requires of me, or that I have made it to require of me. Maybe, this has made me a more responsible person, or maybe it has only succeeded in making not to succeed enough in my studies, I honestly do not know.
  • ‘The Whatsapp group’: this has somewhat been an issue to me since its creation. The problem is: I created the group to serve solely (or basically) as a platform to disseminate information that concern our academic life, I added as many class members as I could to benefit from this, BUT some prefer to convert the status of the group from ‘strictly business’ to ‘fun-for-all’. The group was so anarchical eventually that many leave persistently, including me, during the mid-second semester break (ASUU strike i.e.). I created another one after resumption but the same problem, of getting hundreds and hundreds of chat messages daily, resurfaced. In the end, I came to shape my mind-set into subscribing to the Utilitarian proposition that what is most important is seeking the ‘greatest happiness for the greatest number of people’. I have come to accept that this is a democracy, and the will of the majority must be respected. When the same people that you think you are fighting for turn against you, then you are only wasting your time. Like a Greek philosopher once said; to help a man against his will (e.g. preventing a suicidal person from dying) is, in fact, same as murdering him.

THE GOOD SIDE:

  • ‘Rapport with lecturers and other students’: this is one major reason why many crave to be in the position of class rep. And it is true that my being there has ignited rapport between many lecturers and me. However, I know many students who are closer to all our lecturers than I am. So, I guess it’s never about the position, it’s about the ambition and determination. I have also interacted with many other individuals [e.g. LSS officials, and excos of student organisations], not because they find my personality likable, but because they find my rank instrumental.
  • ‘Public speaking practice’: my public speaking and audience facing skills have been improved, I guess, as a result of the incessant cases where I had to address a class of hundreds for one thing or the other. But I must add, that even though I’ve done it times without count, I still hesitate, most times, before taking those steps to the front of the class.

CONCLUSION: That I may not be criticised for writing something not too far from being a facsimile of ‘So long a letter’, I will promptly conclude by, first appreciating my course mates for understanding and bearing with my inadequacies all these while – all the times I failed or forgot to pass attendance sheets, all the times I could or would not check for results and time-tables on time, all the times you called and I didn’t pick, all the times my voice was not audible enough for the whole class to grasp, all the times I did not speak when I was expected to and the times I spoke when it was uncalled for, all the times it seemed I deliberately shunned some person(s) or that I was not amiable enough, all the times I have, in one way or the other, offended either an individual, a caucus, or the whole class in general, and all those other times, in which I did other things, my frail brain would not remember. I thank you all for understanding; and indeed I am sorry for all those times.

I want to use this medium to enjoin everyone reading this not to hesitate in sharing prickly, but constructive, criticisms whenever necessary, directing them to whoever is concerned, and not minding whose toe is stepped on, not caring whose ox is gored.

What I am trying to say is: censure, reproach and lash the leader whenever he does something that is, in your honest opinion, wrong; whenever his attitude is becoming unbecoming and his actions are turning untoward.

My religion has made me to understand perfectly that the position of leadership is a very crucial and consequential one. It is one which one holding it will be made to compulsorily account for, if not in this world, in the next. My job is to promote the good of the class, and to satisfy its needs. If anyone is aggrieved as a result of my actions or decisions, I cannot possibly know unless I am told. Just like mens rea is no crime and a mere cerebral or wishful acceptance is no acceptance; a mental dissatisfaction, which is not expressed or even impliedly indicated, is no dissatisfaction at all; it is useless.

Verily, the tasks before us are much greater than the ones we left behind. Let us learn from our past mistakes, especially respecting our academic concern, and apply the lessons therein to better our present with a view to inheriting a desired future.

Let us face our studies squarely, yet also remember that facing it only will merely educate us partly and not roundly.

Let us make unity our watchword; sustain the spirit of camaraderie that has kept us thus far; and do away with all fissiparous factors, whether via political affiliations, behavioural polarity or academic envy.

And with the God of Justice on our side, like He has been on our side in all those soccer tournaments, we will get to our preferred termini; and we will be glad, in the end, that we did not get there with another set of great young minds, different from the one we are with now.

Thanks for reading; LOVE YOU ALL!

LEGAL MAXIMS AND THEIR SHORT EXPLANATIONS


LEGAL
MAXIMS AND THEIR SHORT EXPLANATIONS

WRITTEN & COMPILED BY:ESSAYS NG


DOWNLOAD FREE E-BOOK HERE!


 

ACCUSARE NEMO SE DEBET [NISI CORAM DEO]: NO ONE OUGHT TO ACCUSE HIMSELF [EXCEPT TO GOD].

  • Also called the ‘right against self-incrimination’.
  • Similar to ‘Nemo tenetur seipsum accusare’.
  • An accused is fully entitled to plead ‘not guilty’ whatever the facts may be.
  • A witness may refuse to answer questions on the ground that a reply might incriminate him.
  • A confession is not admissible unless it is made freely and voluntarily. It must not be induced through promise or threat.
  • See R v Lagos, Miranda v Arizona and Mapp v Ohio.

 

ACTA EXTERIORA INDICANT SECRETA INTERIORA: THE OUTWARD ACTS SHOW THE SECRET INTENTIONS.

  • This involves the ascertainment of someone’s subjective interest/purpose motivating his/her actions, by considering what the immediate, proximate and reasonably to be anticipated consequences of such actions are and to reason that the person intends to accomplish them.
  • Facta non verba’ – actions speak louder than voice.

 

ACTIO PERSONALIS MORITUR CUM PERSONA: ANY RIGHT OF ACTION DIES WITH THE PERSON.

  • It applies to actions in form of ‘ex delicto’. ‘Delict’ meaning wrong/injury done to someone.
  • It is a common law rule which states that ‘if an injury were done either to the person or to the property of another for which damages only could be recovered in satisfaction, the action died with the person to whom or by whom the wrong was done.
  • In case of injury to the person, if either party dies, no action can be supported either by or against the executors or other representatives.
  • Thus, going by this maxim, it would be better for a motorist to kill rather than merely injure a pedestrian who is unemployed, unmarried, childless and an orphan.
  • The relevance of this principle has been substantially removed by statutes which allow a deceased’s estate to pursue the litigation.
  • It does not apply to personal action founded on contract.
  • It now seems to be generally confined to ‘defamation’.
  • See Phillip v Homfray, Ayodele v Ore and Kareem v Wema Bank Ltd.

 

ACTORE NON PROBANTE, ABSOLVITUR REUS: AN ACTION NOT PROVED, ABSOLVES THE GUILTY.

  • When the plaintiff/prosecution does not prove his case, judgment is for the defendant/accused.
  • The same principle applies to an appellant if the judges are equally divided in their decisions.
  • See Famuroti v Agbeke and Awomuti v Salami.

 

ACTUS DEI NEMINI FACIT INJURIAM: AN ACT OF GOD CAUSES LEGAL INJURY TO NO ONE.

  • The law holds no man responsible for the act of God’ ~Herbert Broom.
  • The loss from an injury caused thereby must be borne by the victim.
  • It refers to an injury, inevitable as a result of an act of God, which no industry can avoid or policy prevent.
  • Supposing a storm causes Mr A’s car to land on, thereby damaging Mr B’s house, Mr B cannot claim damages from Mr A.
  • See Omotayo v Arbuckie Smith & Co. Ltd.

 

ACTUS NON FACIT REUM, NISI MENS SIT REA: AN ACT DOES NOT MAKE GUILT, UNLESS THE MIND BE GUILTY.

  • The intent and the act must both concur to constitute a crime.
  • Similar to Nemo cogitationis poenam patitur: No one shall be punished for his thoughts alone.
  • The existence of a criminal mind may be negated with the defences of: *Mistake *Accident *Compulsion *Consent *Claim of right.
  • A lunatic may however be found guilty of crime, but will not be executed and only kept in custody for lack of ‘real’ intent [i.e. mens rea].
  • See R v Nasamu, Sweet v Parsely and The State v Adelenwa.

 

AFFIDAVIT: HE SWORE.

  • Or ‘FOR HE HAS DECLARED UPON OATH’.
  • A written sworn statement of fact voluntarily made by an affiant or deponent under an oath/affirmation administered by an authorised person.
  • Witnessed by a solicitor or a commissioner of oaths.
  • It may not be admissible as evidence; must be backed up.
  • The content should be only within the knowledge of the affiant.
  • If discovered false, with the intent to deceive; may lead to a charge of perjury.

 

ARMA IN ARMATOS SUMERE JURA SINUNT: THE LAW PERMITS THE TAKING UP OF ARMS AGAINST THE ARMED.

  • The use of arms is only lawful if it is necessary as a form of self-defence, to prevent or repel the commission of a forcible entry or an atrocious crime.
  • See Nwuguru v The State, R v Igwe and The Queen v Jinobu.

 

AUDI ALTERAM PARTEM: HEAR THE OTHER SIDE.

  • First enacted in the Magna Carta, 1215.
  • Similar to ‘AUDITUR ET ALTERA PARS’.
  • No person shall be condemned, punished or have any property or legal right compromised by a law court without being heard.
  • It includes habeas corpus, right to receive notice of hearing and to be given an opportunity to be represented or heard.
  • It is a principle of fair-hearing; that both party shall respond to the evidence against them.
  • It is considered a principle of fundamental justice or equity.
  • The ancient Greek dramatists considered ‘hear both sides’ as part of ‘common wisdom’.
  • Today, legal systems differ on whether a person can be convicted in absentia.
  • Even God, it is said, allowed Adam to make his defence before passing judgment.
  • See King v Chancellor, Cooper v Wandsworth Board of Works, Fawehinmi v LPD committee per Kayode Eso JSC, R v Chancellor of Cambridge Univerisity, Adedeji v Public Service Commission, Akande v The state, adeigun v A.G. Oyo state and Udemah v Nig. Coal Corp.

COMMODUM EX INJURIA SUA, NEMO HABERE DEBET: OUT OF HIS OWN WRONG, NO ONE OUGHT TO HAVE ADVANTAGE.

  • Mostly applied in insurance cases whereby the assured inflicts injury on himself, spouse or property to make a fraudulent claim.
  • See Lek v Matthews and Cole v Accident Assurance Co. Ltd.

 

CORPUS DELICTI: BODY OF CRIME.

  • Plural: ‘Corpora delicti’.
  • A principle that a crime must have been proven to have occurred before a person can be convicted of committing that crime.
  • It is ‘the fact of a crime having been actually committed’ ~Black’s law dictionary.
  • Out-of-court confession of a defendant is insufficient as evidence.
  • An accused cannot be convicted solely upon an accomplice’s testimony.
  • If a person disappears and cannot be contacted, a ‘missing person’ case is initiated. A ‘body’ of evidentiary items must be obtained to establish that the missing individual has indeed been murdered.
  • Misinterpretation: in the case of British serial killer, John George Haigh, he destroyed the bodies of his victims with acid thinking that in the absence of a corpse, murder could not be proven.

 

DOMUS SUA CINQUE EST TUTISSIMUM REFUGIUM: A MAN’S HOUSE IS HIS SAFEST RETREAT.

  • The house of everyone is to him a castle/fortress for his safety, and defence against injury and violence.
  • A house” includes a rented house.
  • In R v Hussay, the tenant was justified to have shot his landlord who tried to forcibly eject him after a quit-notice.
  • See also The Queen v Eyo and R v Ebi.

 

 

 

 

EX PARTE: FOR ONE PARTY ONLY.

  • Or ‘OUTSIDE THE AWARENESS OF A PARTY.’
  • It refers to the proceedings where one of the parties has not received notice and, therefore is neither present nor represented.
  • It is not ex parte, if a notice is received but the person chose not to attend.
  • However, some jurisdictions expand it to mean any proceeding that goes undefended.
  • One of the parties applies to the court and is awarded without the knowledge of the other party who may be bound or affected by the proceeding/verdict.
  • Ex parte applications often seek‘court injunction’.
  • It gives room for injustice.
  • It is not common in the adversarial system.
  • Urgency often leads to it.
  • The party present in court must/is expected to present the case fairly.

EX TURPI CAUSE NON ORITUR ACTIO: OUT OF A BASE/DISGRACEFUL/ILLEGAL CAUSE, AN ACTION DOES NOT ARISE.

  • “No polluted hand shall touch the pure foundation of justice.”
  • “He who comes to equity, must come with clean hands” [a maxim of equity].
  • It means redress shall not be granted to persons involved in an illegal deal.
  • Illegality in an agreement renders it wholly void of legal effect.
  • See Canfailla v Chahin, Stevens v Gourley and Onyiuke v Okeke.

 

HABEAS CORPUS: MAY YOU HAVE THE BODY.

  • Habeas: 2nd person singular present subjunctive active of ‘habere’ – to have.

Corpus: accusative singular of ‘corpus’; plural is ‘corpora’.

  • Fully written as ‘habeas corpus ad subjiciendum.’
  • Also called ‘the great writ’.
  • It is a writ [legal action] that requires a person under arrest to be brought before a judge.
  • It ensures that a prisoner can be released from unlawful detention.
  • The remedy can be sought by the prisoner and anyone coming to his aid.
  • It is addressed to the prison custodian.
  • Others, aside the detainee, can write the petition because he might be held ‘incommunicado’.
  • It may be suspended due to a ‘national emergency’.
  • Types: *Habeas corpus ad deliberandum et recipiendum.

*Habeas corpus ad faciendum et recipiendum (or cum causa).

*Habeas corpus ad prosequendum.

*Habeas corpus ad respondedum.

*Habeas corpus ad testificandum.

 

INTER ARMA, LEGES SILENT: IN THE MIDST OF ARMS, THE LAW IS SILENT.

  • First written by Cicero in his oration; ‘Pro Milone’, as ‘Silent enim leges inter arma’.
  • “The laws will thusnot be silent in time of war, but they will speak with a somewhat different voice” ~ChiefJustice William Rehnquist.
  • “The clatter of arms drowns out the voice of the law” ~Henry David Thoreau.
  • It applies between different states, during civil disturbances or a coup d’état.

 

INTEREST REIPUBLICAE UT SIT FINIS LITIUM: IT CONCERNS THE STATE THAT THERE BE AN END TO LAWSUITS.

  • Or ‘IT IS FOR THE GENERAL WELFARE THAT A PERIOD BE PUT TO LITIGATION’.
  • In effect, the law does not encourage prolonged litigation.
  • The wealthy might cause nuisance to the poor if litigation is not restricted.
  • Hence, the court expects the parties to come prepared and present their points of differences as whole and not in bits.
  • See Ijale v Leventis Co. Ltd and Agu v Ikwibe.

 

JUDEX NON REDDIT PLUS QUAM QUOD POTENS IPSE REQUIRIT: A JUDGE DOES NOT GIVE MORE THAN THAT WHICH THE PLAINTIFF ASKS.

  • If a plaintiff claims the sum of ₦10 as debt from the defendant, the judge cannot grant more even if evidence reveals it’s actually ₦15.
  • See Khawam v Elias and Horizon Ltd v Wasurum.

 

JUDICIS EST IUS DICERE, NON DARE: THE JUDGE DECLARES (EXISTING) LAW, AND DOES NOT MAKE NEW ONES.

  • Under our constitution, the court can only interpret legislations: See Section 4 of CFRN.
  • See Abioye v Yakubu.

 

LEX DILATIONES SEMPER EXHORRET: THE LAW ALWAYS ABHORS DELAYS.

  • ‘Justice delayed is justice denied’ ~William Gladstone.
  • See Usikaro v Itsekiri [Land Trustee.]

 

LEX NON COGIT IMPOSSIBILIA: THE LAW DOES NOT COMPEL THE DOING OF IMPOSSIBILITIES.

  • The law which is founded on good sense and reasoning cannot possibly direct that impossible things be done.
  • See: ‘nemo tenetur ad impossible

 

MANDAMUS: WE ORDER.

  • A judicial remedy or an order from a superior court to a subordinate court, corporation or public authority to do or not to do some specific act which that body is obliged under law to do or refrain from doing.
  • Types: *Alternative *Peremptory *Continuing.
  • Example: In December 2009, Falana, in a suit against the Attorney General, issued for a writ of mandamus compelling Yar’adua to transmit a written declaration to the Senate President and speaker of House of Representatives empowering Jonathan as Acting President [in line with Section 145 of CFRN].

 

NEMO DAT QUOD HABET: NO ONE GIVES WHAT HE DOES NOT HAVE.

  • Sometimes called the ‘nemo dat’ rule.
  • It states that the purchase of a possession from someone who has no ownership right to it also denies the purchaser any ownership right to it also denies the purchaser any ownership title.
  • A person who is not the legitimate owner of an item cannot despatch it to another person.
  • Often stays valid even if the purchaser is not aware.
  • There are exceptions, though, which aim to give a degree of protection to bona fide purchasers as well as original owners.
  • Section 27, Sale of Goods Act: anybody purchasing something without the consent of the legitimate owner only attains the same rights to the item as the dishonest seller.
  • Section 26(1): a buyer from a non-owner obtains no better title than the seller.
  • Exceptions: *Mercantile agent *Sale by joint-owners *voidable contract *Sale by an unpaid seller *Termination of offer *Quasi-contract.

 

NEMO DEBET BIS VIXARI PRO UNA ET ENDEM LITIUM: NO ONE OUGHT TO BE TWICE VEXED (SUED) FOR ONE AND THE SAME CAUSE.

  • Similar to‘NEMO BIS PUNITUR PRO UNO (EODEM) DELICTO’ – No one should be twice punished for one wrong.
  • Similar to the principle of Res judicata; in civil matters.
  • It states that nobody should be twice sued or prosecuted upon one and the same set of facts, if there has been a final decision of a competent court.
  • However, an abortive or premature trial can be retried [see Windson v R].
  • In Connelly v DPP, the defendant tricked the judge by sending a dozen bottles of champagne with the compliment of the plaintiff, hence winning the case. If realised, the case could be re-tried on the ground of a mistrial.

 

NEMO DEBET ESSE JUDIX IN PROPRIA CAUSA: NOBODY OUGHT TO BE A JUDGE IN HIS OWN CAUSE.

  • This is a principle of natural law.
  • Popularly known as the rule against ‘bias’ i.e. anything which tends a person to decide a case other than on the basis of evidence.
  • It is based on the premise that it is against human psychology to decide a case against himself.
  • It accords with the dictum of Lord Hewart C.J. in R v Sussex; ‘Justice should not only be done, but also manifestly and undoubtedly be seen to be done.’
  • A biased decision is a nullity and is ‘coram non judice’.
  • May also be expressed as: *Nemo judex idoneus in propria causa est *Nemo judexin parte sua *Nemo judex in causa sua *In propria causa nemo judex.
  • The maxim crystallised in United Breweries Co. v Bath in which the Lord Chancellor (a shareholder in the company) decided in favour of the canal company.
  • In Wright v Crump [1790], the Mayor of Hereford, England; claimed title to a local house, arranged with a friend to lease it to him and then the friend brought a legal action for the ejectment of the occupants – Lord Mayor himself found for the claimant. Occupants appealed to the court of King’s Bench and the Mayor was sentenced to a term of imprisonment.
  • Exception [doctrine of necessity]: bias would not disqualify an officer if no other person is competent to act in his place e.g. Speaker of a house in impeachment proceedings.

 

NOLLE PROSEQUI: UNWILLING TO PURSUE.

  • Or ‘DO NOT PROSECUTE’.
  • It is most often used in criminal cases.
  • It is called ‘voluntary dismissal’ in civil cases.
  • Similar to it is ‘declination of prosecution’.
  • Its opposite is ‘involuntary dismissal’.
  • It is the prosecutor’s decision to voluntarily discontinue criminal charges either before trial or fore a verdict is rendered.
  • Judges seldom challenge such declarations.
  • It is not a guaranteefor the impossibility of a later re-indictment and nor is it a protection against ‘double jeopardy’ as the merits of the case were not adjudicated.
  • Reasons: *Weak or insufficient evidence.

     *Doubt as to the guilt of the defendant.

*Death of the accused.

 

 

 

 

PAR IN PAREM, NO HABET IMPERIUM: AN EQUAL POSSESSES NO POWER OVER AN EQUAL.

  • Also called the ‘doctrine of immunity from suit’.
  • This is a precept that a state cannot be sued in the courts of a foreign state, along-standing rule of customary international law identified with the personalimmunity of a foreign sovereign from suit.
  • It also applies to private individuals acting in their official capacity or representing their state e.g. USA v Guinto.
  • But when the public official does act contrary to law and injurious to the plaintiff, he is made accountable e.g. Shauf v Court of Appeals.

 

PLUS VALET UNUS OCCULATUS TESTIS, QUAM AURITI DECEM: ONE EYE WITNESS IS STRONGER THAN TEN HEARSAYS.

  • Based on the principle that, at all times, justice must be manifestly seen to have been done.
  • In law, ‘hearsay evidence’ is the opposite of ‘direct evidence’.
  • Also, any evidence given in the absence of an accused is not admissible against him.
  • See R v Samuels and Onwocha v The state.

 

PRO BONO PUBLICO: FOR THE GOOD OF THE PUBLIC.

  • Done or undertaken for public good without any payment or compensation.
  • Necessitas publica major est quam privata: public necessity has priority over a private need.

 

QUI NON IMPROBAT, APPROBAT: HE WHO DOES NOT DISAPPROVE, APPROVES.

  • Hence, a person in authority may be punished for covering a very serious crime known to him/her.
  • In English law, ‘MISPRISION’ is an offence which is to conceal a treason/felony.
  • See R v Aberg.

 

QUI PARCIT NOCENTIBUS INNOCENTES PUNIT: HE WHO SPARES THE GUILTY, PUNISHES THE INNOCENT.

  • For instance, the letting off of a rapist amounts to an ironical/literary punishment of the victim for her agony, violation of dignity and molestation.
  • However, the sentence of ‘cautioned and discharged’ is deemed a conviction and cannot be equated with sparing the guilty.

 

QUI PECAT EMBRIUS, LUAT SOBRIUS: HE WHO SINS WHEN DRUNK SHALL BE PUNISHED WHEN SOBER.

  • …even if a person drunk himself to the state of ‘dementia effectum’ (self-imposed madness), he will be punished for the crime after his sober moment; in common law i.e. before 1920 [introduction of the concept of mens rea].
  • The present legal position is that voluntary drunkenness which deprives a person of necessary mens rea cannot ground a criminal conviction.
  • If intent is coupled with violent passion, guilt is established as he is presumed to intend the natural consequence of the act.

 

QUICQUID PLANTATUR SOLO, SOLO CEDIT: WHATEVER IS AFFIXED TO THE SOIL, BECOMES PART OF IT.

  • In Onuwaje v Ogbeide, the plaintiff warned the defendant not to enter his land warning that it is his. The defendant went ahead to erecta building on the real estate; and then the plaintiff claimed title to it.
  • See also Atanda v Ajani and Tewogbade v Adeolu.

 

RES JUDICATA: MATTER ALREADY ADJUDGED.

  • Also called ‘claim preclusion’.
  • It is a legal doctrine meant to bar continued litigation between the same parties.
  • It may refer to a case which cannot be appealed because there has been a final judgment.
  • It cannot be raised whether in the same court or another.
  • Aims at preventing injustice and a waste of resources.
  • It prevents contradictory judgments and multiple recoveries of damages.
  • Requirements: *Identity in the thing at suit.

     *Identity of the cause at suit.

*Identity of the parties to the action.

*Identity in the designation of the parties involved.

*Whether the judgment was final.

*Whether the parties were given fair-hearing.

  • It includes two related concepts: *claim preclusion *issue preclusion or collateral                                                                                                               estoppel.
  • It may be ignored if there is a deficiency in due process in the adjudged case.
  • See Agu v Ikewide, Iyayi v Eyiegbe and Odjevwaje v Echanokpe.

 

SUB POENA: UNDER PUNISHMENT.

  • A writ by a government agency (court) compelling testimony by a witness or production of evidence under a penalty for failure.
  • The English term, ‘witness summons’ is used in England and Wales.
  • John Waltham, Bishop of Salisbury, createdthe writ.
  • Subpoenas are usually issued by the clerk of the court in the presiding judge’s name.
  • Types: *Subpoena ad testificandum: orders a person to testify before court or     face punishment, in person or by phone.

*Subpoena doces tecum: orders a person to bring physical evidence before the court or face punishment.

 

VOLENTI NON FIT INJURIA: THAT TO WHICH A MAN CONSENTS CANNOT BE CONSIDERED AN INJURY.

  • Expressly or impliedly assenting to an act makes it not to be actionable as a tort.
  • In another sense, no one can enforce a legal right which he has voluntarily waived/abandoned.
  • That party must have known of his legal rights and either by express language or sufficient overt act, tells the other party that he is not insisting on it (or them).
  • See Herd v Weardale Co. and Odua’s investment Co. Ltd v Talabi.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

OTHERS!

CONSTITUTIO RESPICIT FUTURA ET NON PRAETERITA:.

CONSUETUDO EST OPTIMA LEGUM INTERPRES:.

DAMNUM SINE INJURIA ESSE POTEST:.

FRAUS EST CELARE FRAUDEM:.

FRAUS ET JUS NUMQUAM COHABITANT:.

IN CRIMINALIBUS, PROBATIONES DEBENT ESSE LUCE CLARIORES:.

JUSTITIAE DILATIO EST QUAEDAM NEGATIO:.

LEGES AB OMNIBUS, INTELLEGI DEBENT:.

LEGES EXPONERE, NON FERRE, DEBET JUDEX:.

LEX INJUSTA NON EST LEX:.

LEX NON SCRIPTA: NON-WRITTEN LAW.

LEX NON VALET EXTRA TERRITIORIUM:.

LEX SCRIPTA: WRITTEN LAW.

MORBUS EST IMPEDIMENTUM IN LEGE:.

NEMO EST HAERES VIVENTIS:.

NULLUM CRIMEN SINE POENA:.

NULLUM PONA SINE LEGE:.

NULLUM SIMILE EST IDEM: NOTHING SIMILAR IS THE SAME.

QUID AB INITIO NON VALET, IN TRACTU TEMPORIS, NON CONVALESCIT:.

VIM VI REPELLERE LICET: IT IS ALLOWED TO REPEL FORCE WITH FORCE.


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HERE WE GO AGAIN !

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HERE WE GO AGAIN!

‘’Adewole … Ole! Adewole … Ole! Adewole … Ole! ’’
This is the chant that permeated the cool breeze of the serene Thursday night atmosphere on the 14th of March, in the various halls of residence in the University of Ibadan, especially in Zik, Indy and Mellanby hall where I reside. As the saying goes; ‘boys are not smiling’.

It is uncommon to see greatest UItes come out in the open to vent their grievances and resentment. However, on this day, it was absolutely warranted. They were pushed to the wall, and had to fight back. The remote cause of the protest is one that has been confronted in recent past, and which has led to a total cessation of academic activities. It is the issue of sporadic power supply.

I find it awfully lugubrious that the premier university, ‘the first and the best’ is, unlike many other residential universities in Nigeria, unable to boast of constant power supply. Residents of Teddar hall {the VC’s hall} and Mellanby hall {the premier hall} had to succumb to two whole weeks of darkness and near inactivity, while their counterparts in other halls enjoy the little electricity supplied them.

Despite the efforts of the hall excos, writing letters and attending meetings, the school authority still maintains that the students’ plight is none of its concern. The installed inverters that the VC always brags of as an epic achievement were rendered redundant as there was no power to charge them. The kitchenettes were deserted. The reading rooms too had suddenly gone untenanted. Only the high-spirited ones went there with their dimmed torches and reading lamps. The scenario is even worse in the various borehole sites; with long queues of buckets in the few places where water is rushing. Students move from one hall to another just to get water; and cases in which early-morning classes are missed is not uncommon.

Students from the affected halls of residence also have to visit neighbouring halls to press their clothes. The various lecture theatres are always filled with long strings of extension cables brought by desperate students who had run out of better alternatives. Aside from this, UItes became more cautious in the unnecessary usage of devices that depend on light, particularly mobile phones. Intellectual scholars have now forcefully metamorphosed into savages, as they now roar jubilantly to celebrate the slightest indication of power.

It is worthy of note that rumours abound that the reason for the power outage is that the school authority plans to save money by using less than the 1 megawatt allocated to the university. It is of course added that this is just to give room for embezzlement.

Without further ado, the authorities vindicated the popular saying that ‘the only language government seems to understand is protest and strike’, by supplying the much-anticipated power just a few minutes after the peaceful but potent protest started. However, this is not to suggest that the predicament UItes are facing in terms of power supply is, in any way, over.

A few days later, on the 18th of February, we experienced a déjà vu. A similar procession is held by students from Mellanby and Teddar, and again, the light was brought almost immediately to calm the nerves of the infuriated students, but the students have refused to be deceived. As a matter of fact, as I write this in my room {09:10pm}, scores of mellanbites are outside shouting; ‘We must go! We must go! We must go!’ and ‘no bobo!’

The questions that cross my mind now are: Is this supposed to be seen in the acclaimed premier university of Nigeria? For how long will we continue like this? For how long will power supply in the University of Ibadan be appalling, sickening and utterly nothing to write home about?

THE SIGNIFICANT ROLE OF PHILOSOPHY IN THE NIGERIAN PREDICAMENT.

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WHAT I CONSIDER AS THE SIGNIFICANT ROLE OF PHILOSOPHY IN THE NIGERIAN PREDICAMENT.

First and foremost, philosophy is a discipline without a universally and univocally acceptable definition. However, we can, ad hoc, say that it is a (critical) criticism of the ideas we live by {H.S Staniland}. Another word, needing clarification, ‘Nigeria’, is a geo-political entity known by many names, viz. ‘the sleeping giant’, ‘the mistake of 1914’, and ‘the marriage of misfortune’ etc. All these cognomen point to the widely held and spot-on belief that Nigeria is a failed or better still a failing nation.

No doubt, Nigeria is, today, passing through a very challenging phase in its life-span. And various individuals have suggested ways by which we sail through this storm. The question now is, is the knowledge of philosophy, the possession of the ‘philosophic spirit’ and the daily application of philosophical principles, in any way germane to Nigeria’s development as a nation? I reply with a capital affirmation.

Nigerians, today, nurture numerous dangerous and detrimental world-views. Examples of such world-views include, ‘governance is nothing but an opportunity to live large and embezzle’, ‘our votes do not count’, ‘one day, E go better’, ‘leadership is the birth right of Hausas’, ‘Nigeria can never prosper if she does not disunite’ among many others. Knowingly or unknowingly, these ideas have a impeding effect on our voyage of national development. The work of philosophy is to rectify them. It will rectify the Yoruba extravagance, the Ibo materialism and the Hausa megalomania.

Philosophy helps us, not only to be able to think rationally and coherently, but to be able to act in conformity with our thought. This trait is something that the Nigerian populace and government apparently lack, as we have find ourselves engaging day in day out in improvident, impolitic and immoral acts. We do not aim before we shoot, we do not look before we leap, and we do not consider the consequences of our decisions before we make them. Nigerians no longer think. We just accept whatever we are offered without considering if it is deleterious or derisory. We obey the state without considering whether it is appropriate or the state even deserves it. We pay outrageous taxes without asking if we benefit from them or not. We allow ourselves to be easily deceived by ‘men of God’ who are only interested in our earnings. People engage in corruption, misappropriation and cultism because of this paucity in critical thinking. We are a set of people, if not the only one, who ‘suffer and yet smile’. All these are leading to our downfall, but we are oblivious to this fact.

This is where philosophy comes in. Philosophy inculcates us with the spirit of non-dogmatism, objectivity and amity. Imagine a judicial system free from bias and deliberate injustice, an executive that makes logical and pro-people policies within the quickest time possible, a legislature that actually represents the interest of the masses and people who do not have to be policed before they obey state rules and regulations. All these are possible if only we give philosophy the chance.

Imagine a Nigeria ruled by philosophers most especially ethicists such as Epictetus and Plato, and where the citizenry reflect the Socratic dispositions concerning reflective thoughts and loyalty to the state. If this is the case, then it is not possible for the government to make policies that are either harsh or seem to have been made by kindergarten pupils. It is not possible for the government to expend one billion naira on the presidential nourishment annually. It is not possible for the government to even contemplate the removal of fuel subsidy and many other austere policies Nigerians have experienced and are still experiencing.

 

In summation, I am of the view that philosophy is expedient to Nigeria in her endeavour to achieve National unity, peace and progress, and it has a great role to play in the present predicament we, the people of Nigeria, find ourselves.

WHY LAW ?

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WHY I CHOSE TO STUDY LAW.

My decision to study law was not haphazard, but as a result of a number of factors. These factors are what I plan to tersely discuss in this article. The decision is one I’ve made while I was more or less still an abecedarian: during my primary school days. At the time, I understood the significance of choosing ones career at an early stage to give room for the development of passion and adequate preparation. In short, I did not want to be labelled an NFA, id est., someone with No Future Ambition.
Whether, my parents coerced me into it, whether I envisioned it in a dream or whether making this very fundamental choice naturally follows from my zodiac sign being ‘Libra’ – you’ll soon get to know.
The will-soon-be-mentioned points are the reasons for my choosing to be a lawyer, but some of them may equally be considered as reasons anyone should choose law as a profession. The reasons I made the decision, stood by it and never once faltered in my determination to be learned person, thus include:

PROMINENCE OF LAW
No doubt, Law is one of the most renowned and widely recognised professions. Whenever and wherever, good careers are mentioned, law is always among – and then, perhaps, Medicine, Engineering and Accounting. Hence, this was one of the factors that contributed to my decision, as well as the decisions of numerous other children.
Again, Lawyers enjoy a great amount of veneration from others. Anyone tagged as “D-LAW”, is always seen as a reservoir of knowledge and an insightful personalty. Even as a law student, I enjoy this show of respect from people on sundry occasions. And it not only endeared me to the profession, but also re-assures me from time to time that there’s no other course I’d rather take.
UNIQUENESS OF LAW
Apart from the prominence law enjoys as a profession, it is also a quite unique career, most distinct from others. It is mainly because of this peculiarity that non-lawyers express envy towards us, especially in the university environment.
One, law is the most conservative profession. The up-till-today use of wig, gown, latin and archaic expressions attest to this fact.
Secondly, law students are the only set of university students that use clothes of uniform colours: id est., black and white attires. White represents deep wisdom, purity and innocence, while black represents power, authority, as well as blindness i.e fairness and justice.
And lastly, law is the only course in which a department, prima facie, constitutes a whole faculty. All other faculties [and colleges] are split into several departments.
ADVOCACY LAWYERING
A lawyer is either in the profession by accident/coercion, or for the fame and fortune he might get. If not, then he is in it to get and advocate justice, either for himself or for others who have been wronged. No law student would tell you that his own objective for studying law is to defend the wrong-doer against the wronged, or to protect the oppressor from the oppressed. All would-be legal practitioners desire to be advocates of justice, paladins of freedom and heralds of equity. I am no exception.
I have said it before and I will herewith reiterate it: The greatest problem the society, the nation and the world at large is facing is not malaria, neither is it bad roads. Our greatest problem, incontrovertibly, is corruption.
The question now is, which professionals or practitioners are in the best position to tackle this problem? It is definitely not doctors; they only treat those who are the major source of this problem when they’re ill, and then abandon the victims of the corrupt circumstance we find ourselves. It is definitely not journalists; they can only bark, they possess not the necessary canines to bite. It is not engineers. Neither is it accountants. I am of the strong belief that it is none other than lawyers. It is they that have the essential weapon to bring corruptionists to book and prosecute all who involve themselves in unwholesome conducts.
So, just as we have advocacy journalists, there are also advocacy lawyers. These are lawyers that believe in a cause, and utilise their profession in the fight for that cause. Persons like Gani Fawehinmi, who loudly spoke against bad leadership and Nelson Mandela, who publicly condemned apartheid and gave legal aids to blacks who needed them, are perfect examples.
HISTORICAL IMPACT
Law is a profession that has produced many leaders and influential personages who have left indelible trails in the sands of time. They succeeded both in legal practice and extra-legal practice, most of them being renowned politicians, activists and orators.
Paragons of this instance include Abraham Lincoln, the man who greatly promoted the abolition of slave trade and prevented the disintegration of the American union; Nelson Mandela, the first black President of South Africa who played a key role in the struggle against apartheid in South Africa; Mahatma Gandhi, a non-violent revolutionary that successfully clamoured for India’s independence from Britain. Another good example is John Grisham, a world best-selling writer of fictions. And in Nigeria here we have the likes of Patrick Obahiagbon, a controversial orator, political-activist and well-recognised grammarian, and a host of others making names for themselves in the the entertainment, most especially, movie industry.
INDISPENSABILITY
It is worth mentioning that law is also a quite essential and indispensable profession. Most, if not all, institutions can do without medical doctors and engineers, but tell me a company that can live long without prompt and periodic legal succour. In fact, most gatherings require the presence of a lawyer to guide them through their proceedings, and put them to order whenever they dabble into illicitness.
Nations like Russia and France, have in time past, banned the operation of lawyers. But later on, despite the antipathy they harboured against them, they had to rescind the ban, after realising the “indispensability” of law, and by extension lawyers.
LUCRATIVENESS, BROAD RANGE OF OPPORTUNITIES
In time past, Law was a very unrewarding profession. Orators in ancient Athens, Greece, who could be referred to as the first lawyers were required by law not to request for payments for their rendered services. It was like helping out a friend in difficulty. In early ancient Rome too, precisely 204 BC, there was a law banning advocates from taking fees [but the law was widely ignored]. Emperor Claudius later abolished the ban and legalised the legal profession, but he also imposed a fee ceiling of 10,000 sesterces for anyone willing to work as a lawyer.
Nowadays, the tide has turned. Lawyers, are today, one of the most paid professionals. A lawyer who knows his onions well could get paid in millions for a single case, with no stress. The best part is that there abounds a wide range of opportunities for anyone who has been called to bar or who has formal knowledge of legal practice. Such a person could become an advocate, a solicitor, a legal adviser to corporate bodies or to the government, an arbitrator, a lecturer. He can as well successfully seek jobs in fields such as politics, journalism, entrepreneurship and so on, if the competition in legal practice proves too fierce for him.
NATURAL POLEMIC DEXTERITY
Well, I wouldn’t say I was much of a debater, even up till this moment. However, I was a lot better than most of my mates. I was naturally daring, audacious and may be stubborn at times. Recently, perhaps a couple of months back, I found out from my mom that this attitude was inherent in me since I was young, that I even showed it to her apprentices.
I can recall many occasions that I challenged my primary school teachers, secondary school teachers and even university lecturers – and on those occasions, I often got penalised. Even my family, most especially my mom, complain about my habit challenging their dispositions. As a result, one of my brothers always suggested that I train myself professionally as lawyer.
If there is any activity I had interest in and loved doing, it is debating. But please, do not at all confuse debating with public speaking – that I developed just recently. About two years back, I was a poor public speaker, I was very apprehensive of facing a crowd and if at all I did face a crowd, I was always trembling. But gradually, I have been able to improve in that aspect as well.
MY SIBLINGS
YES! Without doubt, this also contributed to my choice of career. It is not the case that all my siblings, or should I say brothers, were lawyers or would-be lawyers. Rather, it is quite the opposite. The three of them chose to go to the science department while in senior high. My eldest brother, now a graduate and bonafide member of the Nigerian labour force, studied computer science while in school. The ‘second in command’ is currently ‘reading’ Estate management in a federal university of technology. And my immediate elder brother is studying pure chemistry at present.
It is a source of pride for me, actually, to be the only ‘black sheep’, the only art student, the only historian, the only literary expert, the only political analyst and, most importantly, the only learned child of the four of us.
“THE INCORRUPTIBLE JUDGE”
“The incorruptible Judge”. This is a book I read in my early childhood. It is authored by Olu D. Olagoke. The theme of this book centre on a judge who is morally upright, who is incorruptible. Then a matter got to his court involving, if I remember corectly, his friend and a rich personality. He was presurised and offered a bribe. However, he would not budge. He stood his ground, and repeatedly asserted that he will only judge based on the pieces of evidence adduced before him in the court. And eventually, he did convict the accused person for he was glaringly guilty.
His attitude is analogous to that of Justice Sowemimo, who told Chief Obafemi Awolowo in 1963, when the latter appeared before him for a 3-count charge of conspiracy and treasonable felony, that,”Here we have one of the first premiers of the autonomous region standing trial. If you were the only one before me, I would have felt that it was enough for you to have undergone the strain of the trial. I would have asked you to go. But I am sorry. I cannot do so now because my hands are tied.”
In a nutshell, I desired to be like this judge. I wanted to be a principled man, who has clearly defined his values, and then would stop at nothing to defend those values. A man who would not compromise his integrity because of familiarity or mere gratification.
CONCLUSION
Well, there you have it. This is the synopsis of the major factors that culminated into my choice of law as a career. I might decide to add some more later on. I did not see my future in a trance, I’m not a gifted dreamer. I was not coerced into the decision, my parents gave me absolute freedom in the aspect. And neither is it because my zodiac sign is libra, in actualty, by bbirthday falls in that of virgo. It is my eldest brother is a libra, and he is not a lawyer.
I want to believe you’ve been exposed to some new facts, as a result of your reading this article. If my guess is right, then I’m glad my effort is not wasted.
Now all want to ask you is, after reading this, if you desire to choose a career for yourself, or perhaps your advice is sought regarding career choice, WHY NOT LAW?

A COMPILATION OF ENGLISH COLLOQUIALISMS IN NIGERIA

image NIGERIAN EXPRESSIONS THAT SEEM ENGLISH BUT ARE NOT. THIS IS A COMPILATION OF WORDS AND EXPRESSIONS COMMONLY USED BY NIGERIANS. THESE WORDS SEEM TO BE ENGLISH IN NATURE, BUT THEY [by THEY, I mean the meaning attached to them] ACTUALLY ARE NOT TRACEABLE TO THE ENGLISH VOCABULARY. SOME ARE INCORRECTLY USED, SOME ARE GIVEN DIFFERENT CONNOTATIONS, SOME ARE ANGLICISED NIGERIAN TERMS AND OTHERS DO NOT HAVE ENLISH ORIGINS BUT SEEM TO DO. MANY OF THESE WORDS ARE SLANGS, BUT SOME ARE NOT BECAUSE THE ARE USED IN FORMAL SETTINGS. {PLEASE NOTE THAT ALL DEFINITIONS USED IN THIS ARTICLE ARE EXTRACTED FROM THE MERRIAM-WEBSTER DICTIONARY} Area: [noun] this is a usually metallic device for radiating or receiving radio waves. The appropriate substitute is antenna. Example: Please change the bearing of the area, it’s not picking up any signal. Big boy/Big girl: [noun] this is a pretty common Nigerian phrase that is used to refer to youths [teenagers and adolescents] that are gregarious, extroverted, proud and often well-to-do. These type of youths are usually singers, cyber-criminals and playboys. Example: Don’t mind Tunde’s attitude, he’s a big boy now. Cassava flakes: [noun] this is a tush way of referring to the common garri [i.e. processed cassava soaked in water] drank in all parts of the country. Chinko: [noun & adjective] this is used to refer to people who come from China, or products, especially mobile phones, that are ‘made in china’. In English, the proper usage is without ‘o’ i.e. ‘chink’. Example: I wouldn’t recommend that you buy a chinko. Chop: [verb] this simply means to eat. But it can also mean to enjoy or maximise an opportunity to the fullest. Example: Take me to a near-by restaurant, I want to chop before going to work. Coded: [adjective] if something is coded, then it is either surreptitious or complicated. It is best known and understood by the speaker. Example: My relationship with her is coded, and I don’t have to speak about it. Collabo: [noun] this is an abbreviated form of the word ‘collaboration’. It is mostly used in the entertainment industry to mean partnership between musicians in the production of a song. Example: The song is a product of the collabo between 9ice and Tu face. Collabo [verb]; is to enter into partnership with someone, especially a singer. 2. It may also mean to make love with someone. Corper: [noun] a corper is someone who is serving the country through the NYSC [National Youth Service Corp] scheme. Most corpers are transferred from their state of residence to neighbouring or distant places to render near-free services to their motherland and to get more experience as well as exposure by so doing. Since, they are often trained and monitored by the military, the word probably has its origin in the army rank: corporal which is above a private first class and below a sergeant and in the marine corps, above a lance corporal and below a sergeant. Example: The government is yet to pay the corpers in Oyo sate. Doe: [noun] simply means money or cash. Example: Gimme more doe, then we can discuss. Environmental: [noun] a non-Nigerian might be confused when he hears that this word is a noun, not an adjective. Well, Nigerians make use of this word as a short-form of ‘environmental sanitation’, a monthly exercise in which people clean-up their houses and its surroundings, gathering the dirt for government to dispose. Example: Please, when is the next environmental taking place? Express: [noun] this word is erroneously used in Nigeria to mean a highway i.e. a wide road that connects two major cities, and is less trafficked. Example: An accident is reported to have occurred on the express. Face-towel: [noun] this is a small absorbent clothe used mainly for drying the face. We have hand towels, beach towels, kitchen towels, sanitary towels, tea towels but no face towels. The equivalent expression used in English countries in possibly towelette. Example: I need to get face-towel, I’m sweating profusely. Flash: [verb] this is in fact one of the most popular words that fall into this category. It means dialling a phone number, allowing it to ring and then intentionally end the call. Rather than use this word, variants such as phone, telephone, call, ring up and dial are more suitable as they can also mean an attempt to reach someone by phone, not necessarily having a conversation with that person. Notwithstanding, flash is still the most perfect word to use, a very nice innovation that fits into the current state of the economy. Example: Don’t worry, when I get to your apartment, I will flash your number. Fleet: [verb] to spray liquid substance from a container, most especially insecticide, into a particular place. I was surprised when I found that the word ‘fleet’, in actualty, does not mean this. Example: Make sure you fleet your room with ‘ota fia-fia’ before going to sleep. Four-One-Nine/419: [noun] this is a felonious crime of obtaining title to another’s property by knowingly making false representations with the intention of defrauding the victim. It is known in legal parlance as false pretence. Most people use this word [419] without knowing the origin. Why is it 419 and not any other set of figures? This is because it is section 419 of the Criminal Code of the Federal Republic of Nigeria that states the meaning, criminality and sanction of this crime. Someone who commits this crime is liable to ‘imprisonment for three [3] years. Example: Due to unemployment, everybody is now engaging in 419. {note that this word may also refer to the person engaging in false pretence} Globe: [noun] this is word that actually means a spherical representation of the earth, a celestial body, or the heavens. However, in Nigeria it is used to connote a lamp that is partially globe in shape. The apposite words to use in replace are ‘bulb’ or ‘lightbulb’. Example: Please switch-off that globe, it’s consuming too much electricity. Go-slow: [noun] in the English vocabulary, this means a slowdown or retardation in business, spread of a disease etc. However, it is used in Nigeria exclusively to mean a traffic jam in which there is slow movement of vehicles. See hold-up. Example: I’m sorry for coming late, it is due to the go-slow along Lagos-Ibadan express way. Hammer: [verb] if someone hammers, then he has just hit it big i.e. he has suddenly, sometimes unexpectedly, gained a huge sum of money. This may be as a result of participation in a contest, lottery or fraud. Example: Everybody gets a free drink today, I just hammered big-time. Hold-up: [noun] this is a traffic situation in which vehicles are temporarily [but for a long period of time] at a halt. Hardly is there any form of movement, as against go-slow in which there is movement, but a minimal rate. Example: Please go on with the meeting, I am in a hold-up. Jack: [verb] to jack is to study persistently for hours, most especially in preparation for an oncoming examination. It’s a common usage in the university environment. I recently learnt that there are different ways to it, such as MTN [from Morning Till Night], TDB [Till Day Break] and so on. It means, in English, to fish in the night using a jacklight, to raise the level of something or to take to task. Example: Is it true Emeka fainted today as a result of excessive jacking? Jazz: [noun] popularly known as “juju” by the Yorubans, this an act of affecting another’s thinking or condition through the use of magical powers, or an object that symbolises this act. The English equivalents are charm and mojo. Example: While in the exam. hall, I forgot all I read. I must have been under the influence of jazz Kobalise: [verb] this word has its root in the Yoruba expression ‘koba’ which was anglicised through the addition of ‘lise’. It means to expose a bitter truth or dark secret about someone, or what that person has done and prefers to remain undisclosed. Example: Why did you kobalise the principal? Now the whole knows he’s having an affair with Mrs Johnson. Machinery: [noun] a person whose professional services are employed and paid for, often illegally, by a group or organisation, especially in order to win a contest against another group or organisation. The closest word to this, in meaning, in the English vocabulary is mercenary. Example: Their soccer team undoubtedly won because they hired skilful machineries. Mama-put: [noun] a local restaurant where foods are sold at relatively low prices. Example: I do not like patronising mama-puts, the hygiene of their foods cannot be guaranteed. Momcy/Momsy/Mumcy/Mumsy: [noun] this means mom. Synonyms include mother, ma, mama, mamma, momma, mammy, mommy and old lady. Example: Momcy is about to be delivered of a baby boy. On-point: [adjective] when something is on point, it is perfect for a purpose or for an occasion, and it needs no modification. Synonyms include spot-on, precise, exact, on-target, dead-on etc. Example: Oh my God, that dressing is just on-point. 2. It may also serve the purpose of emphasis for a particular activity or event you are engaging in or you are planning to engage in. Example: Wedding [things] on-point. Palm: [noun] this is a type of foot-wear, made of rubber, leather or any thick material, which, unlike shoes and sandals, does not cover or support the heels/back side of the foot. Example: A lot of my foot-wears are palms because they are very easy to put on. Pant: [noun] this, in correct usage, means an outer garment covering each leg separately and usually extending from the waist to the ankle [usually used in plural just like ‘trousers’]. But in Nigeria, if you tell someone to take off his pants for an X-ray test, he will definitely be amazed and quizzical. This is because he considers the word to mean knickers or underpants. Example: My most of my pants are size 42. Player: [noun] a player is someone who flirts a lot, has many of girlfriends and is very promiscuous. It has a similar but not exact meaning of ‘playboy’. Example: Didn’t you know Femi is player before you went ahead to date him? Popcy/Popsy/Pop-man: [noun] simply means Dad. Synonyms include father, old man, pop, poppa, pa, papa and daddy. Also see Momsy. Example: I’ll see popsy today concerning my school fees. Runs: [noun] this means the process in which something is done or sought, perhaps examination, admission, youth service etc. Example: How is school runs? Runs [verb]; using an unlawful or inappropriate method to achieve success in a particular thing. The funny thing about this word is what you arrive at when you attempt to figure out the present continuous and future tenses. Do we say ‘runses’ or ‘runsed’? Example: Did Tunde runs his UTME? Shack: [verb] in the English vocabulary, it is a noun that means a hut, room or any similar enclosure. But in Nigeria, it is a variant of the word ‘drink’, only that it is mostly used for alcoholic substances. Example: I hope you have something I can shack in here? Slippers: [noun] or bathroom slippers: this is also a common usage in Nigeria. It is used in reference to foot-wears that are light, open and made of rubber. They are indoor wears that are mostly used in the bathroom while having a bath. The word does exist in the English vocabulary but it depicts a different type of foot-wear which is not open, not made of rubber and perhaps used while sleeping. It is worthy of note that the which this word often erroneously refers to is, in actualty, what is called a pair of ‘flip-flops’.  Example: Please get me a pair of slippers, I need to use the bathroom. Tape-rule: [noun] this is a wrong variant of the words tape and tape-measure. It is a narrow strip of limp cloth or steel tape marked off in units, such as units or centimetres, for measuring. Example: I cannot cut your cloth if I don’t have a tape-rule. Things/Thingy: [noun] used to give emphasis to a particular activity Example: Exam. things. Toast: [verb] does this not mean to make something turn brown by heating it? NO! At least, not in the Nigerian colloquial usage. Rather it means the act of flirting [i.e. behaving amorously without serious intent] with another, especially one belonging to the opposite sex. A toaster refers to one who is fond of toasting, or who is flirtatious in nature. Example: I am tired of toasting here and there, it is high time I settled down. Tush:[noun & adjective] In England, this word means a long pointed tooth and is a slang for buttocks, but here in Nigeria it means something else, an expression or somebody that is classy. Example: I love Whiz kid, the guy is just tush. Tush up [verb]; to fancy up an object or to become classier than before. Example: Please Dad, try and tush up a little. You can’t come to my convocation looking like that. Yuppy: [noun] this is used to refer to a type of motorcycle, better known to Britons as Moped. I hardly see it again. If you want to know what it looks like, buy an Indian movie. Example: Where did you get this yuppy? I didn’t know they still use these. MORE COMING SOON !